ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS

is YOU!!
is my two front teeth!
or any other fill-in-the-blank line of a popular Christmas carol!

Just kidding.

Ok. For reals.  You know the drill.

..........................................................

 Dear Santa, 


      I have been a good girl yadda yadda yadda...
Let's cut to the chase.

1. (see picture)

I want one.  

No. The ukulele, you fool.

          

     2. Red Boots.

...not these:

NO FUR! remember?

definitely not these:

But THESE:

A classy, yet worn, cowgirl approach would be alright

     3.  A light blue dress that I can twirl in. 

Preferably the one in the middle.  (As seen in 500 Days of Summer.)

That is all.

Love,

Sarah

P.S.  Q mentioned that I should put the boy down the street on the list, but that came as sort of an early Christmas present this weekend, so it doesn't count for one of my three wishes.  Just letting you know the rules on that sort of thing.  

AWKWARD TURTLE

Just pondering on the whole dating hoopla.... 

Just humor me and read this post.

Please.

The Background:  You are pretty sure the interest is mutual between one another.  There has been no DTR, however.  And ZERO physical affection.

.........................................

Situation #1: The DTR.  Hour car ride on the freeway to date destination.  

"So, uh. Us. I mean I kinda like you.  And I guess you kinda like me.  So. Ya....etc."[I have to resort to finishing this conversation with an "etc." because it would cause me so much pain to type out the rest of that dialogue.]

AWKWARD.

Situation #2: The Pause. The night is still young, but still a reasonable time to part separate ways and go home. But there seems to be evidence that neither party wants to leave-- or be brave and suggest plans to continue the night.

"So.... I guess.... I will see you....... tomorrow then....[leaving ample space for the other to interject a second conversation topic.  You don't catch on.]....Ok. Bye. " [leaves car to enter house] 

AWKWARD.

Situation #3:  Doorstep. Need I say more?

AWKWARD.

Situation #4: The Movie.  Note: this is a good thing that the night didn't continue on, otherwise this would have inevitably been the default activity.  Do you sit close? Hold hands? Let him put his arm around you? Sit on separate couches?

[Both sit with arms crossed with a 10-bible-thick-separation]

AWKWARD.

Situation #5: The Matchmaker Roommate.  While having polite conversation, the roommate comes in an starts serenading both of you on the piano.

"What is that you are playing?"

"Improv.  For you two." [both avoid eye contact with each other]

AWKWARD. 

Situation #6: The Second Date. The first one went well. He calls for a second. "Hey, would you like to go out on Saturday night?"  In response to this long awaited call, you forget to mask your ecstatic emotions and boldly reply with an intense:

"YES." [The silence between you is as thick as the sweater that your grandmother knitted you for Christmas] 

with little explanation, or a statement like "yeah, that sounds fun." 

Just, "YES."

AWKWARD.

Note for the reader:  These are a mix of real-life and imagined situations.  Moral of the story?  Pre-DTR is--yup, you guessed it,

 AWKWARD.

 

 

I ♥ FROZEN YOGURT

Yup. It's hip.  It's fashionable.

And I am totally jumpin' on this bandwagon {when I normally don't do anything of the sort}
Because it is THAT good.

Reasons:

1. Pay-per-ounce. Therefore I get to control the cost of my dessert.  For better or worse.
2. 4 different shops in my immediate location.  Listed in preferential order:
1. Earth Fruits 
2. Yozone
3. Spoon Me
4. Hello Yogurt
3. Fresh fruit topping choices (kiwi, strawberry, mango, blackberry, etc.)
4. Mochi.
5. Mini gummy bears for toppings
6. Somewhat healthy
7. Yummy yogurt flavors--like tangy mango and pomegranate. 

HE'S NOT MY TYPE

if he says any of the following questions on a first date:

1. So... is there anything that you aren't excellent at? No.  There isn't. (GOSH how in the WORLD do you want me to answer that one and preserve my dignity?!?)
2. Where do you get your style from? Not your mom I am assuming... My mother is actually pretty classy.  Unlike your manners and questions...
3. Do you have any strong political opinions you want to discuss? No.
4. What do you want out of life? Lots of money with little or no work, trophy husband, and a city named after me. What about you?
5. So mechanical engineering, huh? What do you want to do with that? Is this a trick question?
6. So uh, you want a career then? I hate children and I can't cook. I like to focus on my strengths.
7. What do you value in life? See answer #4 above
8. Are you REALLY happy with your life? Uhhhhh.....
9. Have you heard of [insert obscure philosopher's name] and his theory on [insert philosophical topic] ?? no comment.
10. What is your opinion on philosophy? That it is a inferior subject compared to math and music....  

...OH. That's your MAJOR?! I would have never guessed.

......................................................................

I like to think that I live by a set of philosophies...er, um, bad word... "Guiding Principles"  Stuff like, ya know:

• Don't shop at a place that intentionally spells their name wrong. (i.e. a gas station named "Qwik Stop")

• Studying is overrated right before a test.  If you don't know it by now then you won't learn it over night so just get some rest.

• Take as long of a lunch break as you need to recuperate before returning to work.

• Always cook rice in a rice cooker.  They are cheap, and SO MUCH EASIER AND EFFICIENT than the stove.

• Always use your blinker.  It is just courteous.

• Never vote straight ticket.  There are idiots on both sides.

AND now I add a new one to the list:

• Don't go out with philosophers.*

*This has been backed up by more than one male.  I have a good sample size, don't you worry. And this is NOT the pie-shake-tuxedo-man, fyi. 

REJECTION

I am really good at saying no

when a boy, whom I am not interested in, asks me out 

when someone asks me if I like children

when someone tells me I should be a music major

when a guy wants to discuss politics on a date

And when the U.S. Navy asks me to fix their ships for them.

STICK IT TO THE MAN. 

*fist bump*

Yup.  The "top secret" internships didn't come in like I had hoped.  But a hard-hat-on-head and hammer-in-hand engineering job came up.  Can you picture a girl like me {for you strangers: blonde girl in a pencil skirt with stilettos} out in a naval ship yard maintaining ships?






Yeah. That's what I thought.

Before everyone gets the wrong idea, I was flattered by the offer, but don't think I would be very useful with a wrench.  I am more of a design/analysis/number crunching type person, ya know... or a....Ok fine. Nerd.

There. I said it.

ExxonMobil looks appealing to me.  Consider this: Last summer I was a part of a climate study and researched global warming.

 If things go my way, next summer I might be creating global warming and destroying the earth with drilling.

Again, stick it to the man.

HOW TO GET A DATE IN THE LIBRARY

I have refined this to a science.

Ok fine. I know.  I need to stop relating my social life to the subjects I am studying.

But hey, my theories prove true.

When selecting a table to study at in the library, one must:

1. Check the left hand. (Sorry, but this is BYU, folks.)
2. Check for good looks
3. Check the body language of the girl next to him (if the case may be, it might be his girlf)
4. Glance at the titles of his textbooks in order to make a decision on his intellectuality.
5. Yes, this can be considered profiling. Shoot me.

All within a matter of microseconds. This is tough work!

That isn't an exaggeration, either.  There are lots of guys, uh, "tables" to scope out.

Oh, and once you are seated, 

     6. Make sure your study area looks available and welcoming.

Does this barrier of books, TI-84 and MacBook look sexy?

That's what I thought.  I thought I was doing a great job of warding off my fellow male classmates.  Not particularly in the mood for dating....

Don't give me weird looks. 

 I don't have to take my own advice

 on date shopping in the HBLL.

Anyways. I "picked the right table" on accident.

An econ major.  (The barrier was made of my Econ 110 textboks)

I had to rip off a corner of my econ assignment to write down my number for him.

That's what you get for studying in the periodical section, folks.

I HATE BORSCHT.*

List #6

I hate borscht because...

1. It turns my hands purple from all of the beets.
2. It takes two years to cut up all of the vegetables required.
3. It tastes like red water.
4. I am incapable of making it.
5. I could tie-dye purple shirts in a vat of it because of all the cabbage/beets. Gag me.
6. I hate borscht.

It was bad. No pictures today.

*Overdramatization

BRAGGING RIGHTS

Sorry, I just have to spill my happy secrets today.

Two of 'em.

Ready?

1. I might get to be a co-author on this biology research paper that I have been assisting my professor on all summer.

Yes, I will attach my name-Me. Sarah- To an actual piece of science. For better or worse (concerning my reputation in academia).

2. I secured a possible engineering internship (I say "possible" because I haven't committed yet) with a company that makes devices for biology research.

 Yes, this was a connection from my summer job.  The vice president was impressed when I wired the data loggers correctly.

Maybe this is why I am not ready to go back to school--my brain has been thinking and reasoning at maximum capacity during the past three months.  I need to...veg out...or something.

Two cheers for Sarah's academic success this summer.
Ooof. "Academic" and "summer" should not be in the same sentence...

THE GOODBYE OF GOODBYES

Tomorrow morning I will "send off" my final missionary.

{not that kind of send off...}

But Phil is the last of my guy friends to leave...And he might just be my favorite.

Why might he be my favorite??

Well, maybe because...

1. The first time I saw him he thought I was diggin' him  and got all excited

2. He does this crazy pogo-stick dance and doesn't care that he looks ridiculous 

3. He knows how to be a full-fledged womanizer and act innocent about it

4. He thinks I am one of the few girls in the world who can pull off bangs

5. He gave me an autographed picture to put on my mirror when he is gone

6. and this bad-A vividly colored gangsta t-shirt which he looks goofy in because it is too tight and he is a total white bread boy.

7. as you can see in the picture, he is TOTALLY made of broomsticks--as it is well-said by my good friend Amy

Alas, I am still a bit ticked that he wouldn't give me his MIT shirt that he is wearing.  I, an actual engineering student, could pull that one off so much better than him.

730 days. {and counting.}

LIST #5-SUMMER BUCKET LIST

I know we all have 'em, but I feel like posting mine for all cyberspace to see....

1. Climb a mountain to the summit
2. Go tubing in the Provo river
3. Actually use the swimming pool in my apartment complex...I might as well get my money's worth out of my astronomically high rent...
4. Visit the hot springs
5. Go mountain biking... you already heard how disastrous this was.  At least I can say I tried.
6. Float in the Great Salt Lake -- I have heard it is possible because of the high salt content...So me and Jordan are going to have our own little episode of Mythbusters.
7. Fry an egg on a sidewalk
8. Have a picnic with watermelon, potato salad, corn on the cob, and all other foods deemed "summer-y" on a red checkered tablecloth
9. Spend so much time in the sun that my hair bleaches to platinum
10. Before I move out of my apartment this week I want to walk to Jordan's apartment from my front door and time it to see if it really is under two minutes.

I'll keep you updated on what happens next.

LIST #4

REASONS WHY I LOVE MY JOB IN THE FIELD:

1.  I get paid to sit in the wildflowers (while waiting for machines to collect data)

2.  I make infrared sensors with a soldering iron and wire them into the data loggers.

3.  I get paid to watch water trickle into dirt very slowly. (for soil infiltration rates)

4.  I acquire a pretty spectacular tan{and tan lines} at 10,000 feet because there is little obstruction of UV rays at that altitude.

5.  I stay in this cute vintage cabin with hot water and a toilet

6.  There are always new species of wildflowers in bloom each week

7.  I get to pick all the wildflowers-unlike other people-because I am a scientist and I can call it "research"

8.  I have little distractions in the wilderness so that I can ponder God, and life, as well as solve all of the world's problems - like world hunger - in my head. {I will let you know when I reach a solid conclusion.  I am still in the brain storming phase on that one...}

9.  Since I am surrounded by hippie biologists, I am privileged to be the butt of all jokes--the engineer jokes are flying constantly.

10. I am learning about all of the edible plants in the area so that just in case I am stranded in central Utah, I will be able to  survive on glacier lily seed pods, wild rose, as wells as various roots and berries.

LIST # 3

REASONS WHY I HATE MY JOB:

{Sorry for the pessimism. It's been a hard week.}

1. I have to use MS DOS command lines to run this archaic ecosystem simulation program. (I feel like I am in the 80's)

2. Fixing errors in the simulation program

3. Fixing more errors in the program

4. Reading 3 user manuals to find scattered information to fix my problem

5. Finding out I wasted three weeks making uncessary weather files for the program

6. And that the lady who wrote the program thinks I am a total pinhead because I can't deciper her cryptic directions in the manuals.

7. Well she is a pinhead because her user manuals suck.

8. Yes, I am writing this post instead of working.

9. I am so mad I don't care that there are an uneven number of items in my list.

LIST #2

WHY I LOVE MY JOB IN THE BIOLOGY LAB:

1. I get to play in the dirt

2. I get access to BYU's chemical stockroom. (12 M Hydrochloric acid, anyone??)

3. I get to zip around campus with the biology department vehicles.

4. I get paid to go camping

5. I get to make graphs and linear regression models-which happens to be my favorite past time.

{{Pretty much, I have the best summer job ever.}}

LIST #1

I love to make lists. Here goes my first one on my blog.

Reasons Why I Love My Bangs...

They...

1. Accentuate my attempted vintage style

2. Cover the red mark on my forehead from sleeping on my desk in the library

3. Hide the ugly zits on my forehead

4. Provide a nice barrier to cry behind...{no one can tell, heh heh heh!}

5. Are versatile. Can be swept to the side, pinned back, or worn straight and simple

6. Dry naturally in quite a nice fashion

7. Or alternatively, can be styled with a straightener in less than 45.73 seconds.

8. Seem to be in style

9. At least, I see girls with similar haircuts quite frequently.

10. But not like I really care, I am just compulsive and need 10 things on my list.

"I CAN HAVE IT ALL!!"

Ok, I have some big dreams for the next seven years that don't quite fit into my budget or my time table. You ready for this? (One of my greatest joys in life is creating lists and organizing things into perfect time slots...oh so fulfilling...)

1. Graduate from BYU's Mechanical Engineering program ( April 2013)

2. Serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. (CLICK HERE)
(February 2012)

3. Participate in a humanitarian group called Engineers for International Development (CLICK HERE) and travel to a 3rd world country to implement the product that we would design. (April 2012)

4. Study Abroad during spring/summer semester (April 2011)

5. Get a summer internship with some airplaine company...like Boeing...or Lockheed Martin. Maybe Northrop Grumman. (Summer 2012)

6.Get married (??)

7. Maybe work one or two years in industry at one of the above mentioned companies

8. Participate in the Orchestra at Temple Square(In the process of auditioning...)

I want you to notice that THREE of my goals would theoretically be occurring the summer after my junior year. Simultaneously. Dang. (mission, internship, EID)

Also consider that a mission and study abroad would probably cost me $15,000 if I did them both...And if I truly want to graduate from BYU in April of 2013 then if I take a year and a half off for a mission it will set me off to December of 2014.

And then... WHAT IF I GET HITCHED? Just to make things a little more complicated all around....That means that study abroad, mission, and possibly the internship wouldn't be possible.

Do you see my dilemma?

When I get frustrated I just remember what my roommate Victoria had hanging on her wall: A picture of Liz Lemon devouring a sandwich and exclaiming " I can have it ALL!"




{In the “Sandwich Day” episode from the second season of 30 Rock, protagonist Liz Lemon hopes to reconcile with her ex-boyfriend Floyd at the airport, who is leaving New York City to head back to Cleveland. Stopped by security, Lemon must choose between him and her sandwich, which she can’t take with her to the gate. Refusing to compromise, she yells “I can have it all!” and promptly devours her delicious sub before running through security.}