IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME

A few months ago I, rather dramatically, dedicated a post to my new bf of the semester: my major.

Haha. Now, I laugh.

"Trading men for matrices and flirting for free body diagrams" ? 

Try: Traded Studying for Spencer.

And after being force fed hundreds of equations and still having outputs of "C" on my tests, I think it is time for us to take a break.

I am here this afternoon to publicly denounce that title of boyfriend.
Especially with two weeks left in the semester.

Mechanical Engi....who? 

I dropped him like he's hot.*  

 It's ok, I applied for all my scholarships this week so I could use my good GPA before it TANKS after finals.




*Don't freak.
I'm not changing my major.

TIPS FOR OPTIMIZING DATING

All I need to know about 

maximizing my dating 

can be explained 

by simple

principles of economics.

Consider a situation where someone is trying to decide whether or not to continue dating their significant other...  There are a few questions one might want to ponder before executing an action.

1. Is there anything more to be gained from the relationship? (Is there more you can learn about the other person? Is there more you can learn from the other person? )

2. Would you still find it worth your time to continue dating said person?

If you say yes, continue dating.  You haven't maxed out in benefit. If you say no, then you should either break up with the person or marry them because the cost of dating said person has outweighed the benefits. 

So simple. I heart economics.

But then the individual always says:

"But I have invested so much in (insert name here)!"

or in more common
 young adult language:

"But we are such good friends
and have spent so much time together!"

To that, economics has yet another simple answer:

Sunk costs are irrelevant.

Translation: that which was spent in the past is nonrecoverable and can never affect marginal cost benefit analysis.  Or, in three words: History is bunk.

And that is the cold-hearted, hard-nosed, 

economical truth.

Author's note:  I don't wholeheartedly believe this.  Simply put, this principle is monumental in helping girls understand how their business-minded ex could justify dumping them like that [snap fingers]...

Girl, I've only got one thing to say to ya: an economist's analytical skills are WHACK. 

DEAR CANDIS AND CORIN

I suppose I can dedicate a post to Corin, since she represents half of my fan club...

{But just you watch, the hype will get going soon.  I can just feel it.

Who can resist a spirited girl's blog that is laced with engineering jokes??}

I know, right?!  That's what I thought!!

So I heard that the question on the streets these days is who is this Jordan character that seems to appear in every single one of my posts?  No longer will you have to satisfy your curiosity by squinting at the hiking photos which are much too small to do any justice.....


I have a bigger and better photo for all (ok. fine. I have like, two followers at this point) of you guys!

Everyone, meet Jordan....

{scroll down as you create your own drum roll sound effect}

I think I just heard everyone sigh as if they were watching the sappy ending of a chick flick.

Oh get over yourselves--it is ok to sigh like that every once in a while.  

Remember: The act of admitting it is the first step in overcoming your hopeless romanticism.

WHAT I LEARN AT COLLEGE

Today, many dating secrets were revealed to me with an equation presented in my statics class.

(I know what you are thinking-it is not supposed to be statistics. It really is statics. Think physics on steroids.)


NEWTONS LAW OF GRAVITATIONAL ATTRACTION



The above equation describes the gravitational force "F" between two objects
where m₁ and m₂ are two masses, respectively

r is the distance between the masses

and G is a constant.


Therefore, the more obese the couple is, the more the force of their attraction goes up. Just increase the "m" values and watch "F" go up...

AND

This is why long distance relationships never work out. If you increase "r" too much, the force of attraction goes dramatically down because of the inverse square proportionality.

Everything I need to know about dating is in my statics textbook.

Now you know why my social life is a desert.